When the urge to nest hits you, it is difficult to think of much else. Over the last few weeks, I have had an increasingly strong urge to clean all things. Up high, down low. Pretty much everywhere. The problem with this nesting urge is that it comes at a time in my pregnancy where I am pretty much unable to maneuver my gigantic ass in order to clean these things. I can start a project, work at it for ten minutes or so, but then have to sit down and regain my breath and/or overall body function.
Yesterday, however, solely because MB is now aware that he is on “my fiance is pregnant and overly emotional house arrest”, we got a lot accomplished (read: HE got a lot accomplished, I dusted things that I didn’t have to squat to get to). We were able to put together our adorable swing, the play yard and the stroller and clean the entire basic living area of the house from top to bottom. I feel relieved. Of course, there is still a lot to do, but progress is progress.
Now the dilemma for me is that we have this play yard just sitting in the middle of the living room as a constant reminder that I AM STILL PREGNANT. We don’t even have a BABY to put in this thing yet. And it makes me more impatient than I already was! (If that is possible.) It is hard enough not to be impatient when something is constantly kicking you in your bladder and reminding you of the days when you were empty and peed like normal people with normal sized bladders.
The next stop on the mother of all to-do lists is to pack my hospital bag. I am super ignorant as to what this bag should contain, however, and am worried that I will either forget something super important or pack like I am going on a vacation somewhere. I know that I don’t need to bring 32 pairs of shoes and I am in no danger of packing a bikini (because I cringe at the thought of THIS body in a bikini), but I am pretty sure I will pack like I always do. Like a crazy person. Because you never know how many sundresses you will need after giving birth. You know…necessities. A friend suggested that I check out a website that has a check list for this type of thing, so I guess that will my plan for tomorrow. I will have to try and work it in between my bouts of intense anxiety.
My mood is, however, improving. I didn’t even burst into tears yesterday. Not even once! And today, when I woke up to find that bees had invaded one of our bathrooms, I did not panic and did not become a profanity-screaming lunatic. I calmly explained to MB that, the buzzing sound I thought was the result of a common house fly stuck between the blinds and the window pane was actually about ten bees which had taken over the bathroom. Then I called my landlord, who is on vacation and probably doing Easter things with his grandchildren and calmly explained that this is not cool at all and that I am terrified of bees and chemicals used to kill bees and that exterminators are busy eating ham and searching for Easter eggs and cannot be bothered, but kindly asked that he have someone fix this tomorrow morning (or I will surely go insane). In the meantime, MB attacked the bathroom armed with some sort of spray and a shoe and all seems to be good for the time being. (And he only got stung one time!) Phew.
God, I am exhausted.
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Broken Condoms 
This is the first post I have read of yours, so forgive me as I am coming in quite late in your story to accurately assess why you are so anxious, and how far along you are.
However! That bee thing. . . sounds terrible. Although I’m not afraid of or allergic to, I think I would be quite upset if bees invaded my bathroom! I hope it turned out well, and that you didn’t have to be around harmful chemicals.
Just a couple of thoughts on your hospital bag as I had a hard time figuring out what to pack in mine. Now, having been there I can tell you what I needed and didn’t need.
I read in a magazine to take some good, soft toliet paper because what they have there is rough and horrible and that is very true. We took a whole 4 pack and used most of it and would highly recommend doing this.
Also, take lots of comfy socks rather than house shoes or in addition to them. You are going to be surprised how dirty your socks can get. I ended up needing at least one pair a day while we were there.
Things I didn’t need – entertainment; books, magazines, a lap top were all suggested and I did not need any of the. Any free time I had I spent trying to rest because you are going to be disturbed so much that you will not get rest.
Take comforting things – lotion with a scent you like, massage oil, etc. This is a nice way to relax in an otherwise very unrelaxing environment. Also, chap stick that you really like and that stays on. You are taking so many pills, drinking fluids and so on. I found I had to put on chap stick a lot.
Lastly, I also overpacked. I did not wear any of my clothes other than the day we went home. It was just easier to be in the hospital gown. Oh, and take a nursing bra if you plan to nurse. You are going to be nursing a lot and I was glad to have the bra to wear under the gown.
Oh, one more thing I forgot. I was so out of it after having to have a c-section and from the sleep deprivation that I had my mom go get me a spiral notebook so I could take notes on the conversations I had with doctors as well as write down any questions I had so when I met with the doctor I would remember to ask them.
We had 3 bees in our bathroom 4 days ago!! Last year or perhaps the year before than we had a bee invasion. They were SWARMING outside our 3rd story window and then they got in the attic and were trying to get through the air filters. It was like a bad Lifetime Movie Network show, attack of the killer bees. I left and slept at another house that night, and the next day, the bees had moved on. The exterminator person said that sometimes bees move in swarms trying to find a good spot to build a hive, and they try different places out then move on to the next.
Needless to say we were lucky when they moved on. And I was happy that 3 bees were the only story I had from the other day. I think my cats managed to kill 2 of them?? How did they not get stung?
A couple of things I wish I had (more of) in my bag – tops that were easy to pull up or over the shoulder. Make it easy to nurse, so dresses with sleeves are impossible unless you want to pull it all the way up or expose an entire boob. This is also something to think about once the baby comes. Wear it now, because in a couple of months you’re not going to get to wear those sorts of things for a while.
Also, pack a couple of different sized onesies. They say “newborn” but there is such a range in scale. Pack teeny tiny and then just tiny. You never know what size they’ll pop out. I had about 3 outfits for EB that were just huge and I wish I had packed more options.
I just read an above comment about the nursing gown. This is totally up to you. I just bought a cheap black dress from walmart because I could pull the shoulder strap down and it was stretchy and comfortable. I also lived in the nursing tanks from target. I wasn’t a big fan of the gowns for the reason I wrote about above. How the heck do you nurse in it without exposing everything? There might’ve been a trick but I never stopped to find out.